When engaging in conversation, it’s crucial to start by highlighting common ground and shared goals, emphasizing agreement rather than differences. Throughout the discussion, maintaining the focus on shared interests helps keep the atmosphere positive. The idea is to convey that both parties are working towards the same end, differing only in method, not purpose.

This principle is reiterated from previous discussions – as long as the conversation revolves around shared interests or purposes, it proceeds smoothly. However, delving into disagreements often leads to conflict, diminishing the chances of persuading the other person. Preventing the other person from uttering a definitive “No” is key, as overcoming a “No” is challenging due to the involvement of pride and ego. Carnegie advises starting the interaction by eliciting “Yes, yes” responses, steering the person in an affirmative direction.

To illustrate, imagine a child seeking permission for a pet dog. Instead of a direct inquiry that could result in a straightforward “No,” the child begins by aligning the mother with positive statements. For example, expressing love for dogs and a desire for a pet can elicit “Yes” responses before making the ultimate request for a dog. In essence, securing a series of affirmations creates an agreeable tone in the conversation, significantly improving the likelihood of obtaining a positive outcome.