Most people attempting to persuade others talk too much. Instead, Carnegie advises allowing the other person to express themselves fully by asking questions and listening patiently. Interruptions are discouraged, as people are more receptive when they’ve emptied their thoughts. Carnegie emphasizes the importance of this approach, especially in disagreements or differing perspectives. Allowing the other person to talk demonstrates care and opens them to alternative viewpoints. When arguing, letting the other person express themselves can dramatically improve the situation.

Carnegie also notes that even friends prefer discussing their achievements over listening to ours. Quoting La Rochefoucauld, he suggests that letting friends excel fosters camaraderie. Constantly boasting about personal achievements can make friends feel inferior and envious, damaging relationships. Carnegie’s advice is to let friends excel, allowing them to feel important and maintaining positive connections. This underscores the significance of not overshadowing friends with one’s accomplishments. Carnegie advocates effective persuasion by letting others talk, being patient, and avoiding excessive self-promotion, fostering better understanding and stronger relationships.